Running on Cherry Pie

It's been a long time since I've run more than about five steps--a long, long time. I decided that today would be a good day to go for a little run. I don't know why I decided that today would be a good day for such foolishness--I was already super tired.

There is a road sign that happens to be just a hair over a half mile away from my house, so I decided that I would run down to the sign and back. Of course, I'm always curious to know how out of shape I am in, so I wanted to find a stop watch, but thank God I couldn't find one because I'm pretty sure it took like ten minutes. So, probably it wouldn't have been that much different if I had just walked... or rolled, even.

Since it has been so long since I had run, and since I've never been much of a runner anyway, I thought I did pretty well (until I got home and realized that it took forever). I'll tell you what, though--it really hurt. I'm not sure why. I think it has something to do with the fact that I ate half a cherry pie before I left. Maybe it's just because I'm fat, but it seems like that might be too much cherry pie. Too much cherry pie??? That's just crazy talk. No, it just hurt because I'm a fat, fat man.

By the way, that whole little adventure happened after I went to Slumberland. They had a nice couch I'd like to buy for sale for like $400. If anybody would like to make my day and send me $400, or if anybody wants to do their Christmas shopping for me early, please let me know. Also, they are having a sale where if you spend $499 or more you get $100 off. So, that means if you want to get something $100 or more at Slumberland, we can go together and I can get my couch for $300...so let me know.